Sunday, January 21, 2007

Our Big News

Ok, before I share this big news with you, I must go back and share with you a piece of an earlier post. So just a warning, this is going to be long.

This is from Sept. 14, 2006:
On Tuesday, after preschool, I got a call from Emma's teacher. So I answer the phone, and I hear, "Dana, this is Missy". Of course, my heart skipped a beat because I was thinking, "oh no, she's been in school for a week, and the teacher's already calling me to tell me we have a problem". This is what she said, "I just wanted to let you know that we pray every day and Emma is praying for a baby sister. She's not just praying it, she's praying it with all her heart. It almost made me cry". It's all Emma talks about. We will be going through a store and she'll see something in the baby section and she will say, "can we get that for my baby sister?" I'll say, "Emma you don't have a baby sister." She'll say, "not yet". I haven't figured out how to explain this to her yet but here's the situation:

In May 2002, I had surgery to remove a cyst the size of a softball from my ovary. When they were doing the surgery, the doctors discovered that I had endometreosis growing pretty much everywhere. The doctor then told me that the chances of me having children was very slim. He recommended me taking a drug called Lupron and said that if I didn't do that, the chances were next to nothing. I remember getting home and lying in bed praying (lying in bed only because I was too sore from surgery to hit my knees) "God, all I've ever wanted to do is be a mother. If it is in your will for me to adopt, I can do that. I know I can love any child but, I really long to know how it feels to carry and nurse my child. If you will only give me one, that's all I ask for". So, to make a very long story just a little bit shorter, After a lot of prayer and counsel from some Godly women, we decided not to do the Lupron. It had some harsh side effects, was very expensive, and I was very concerned about the long term effects of putting something that strong into my body. I started looking into natural ways to control the endometreosis and in October 2002 became pregnant with Emma.

So anyway, I tell her every day that I know God must love me a lot because he gave me her and her daddy. But, I don't think that she's quite old enough to understand the miracle that she really is. And, that I'm sticking to my deal. If God decides to bless us with another child, wonderful! But, I'm satisfied with my one. But, she's praying hard. And, the faith of a child.... I guess we'll see. But, I did attempt to explain a few things to her and this is how it went:

Me: Emma if God decides to give us another baby, He will also decide whether that baby is a boy or girl.
Emma: Then we can have twins and the boy can live with someone who wants a baby brother
Me: No, if we had twins, both of them would live with us.
Emma: Lots of crying with real tears.
Oh goodness, what will I do!

Ok, so it should have been a clue to me when I had to stop 20 times to go the the bathroom on our way to Alabama for Christmas. Well, apparently, I'm an idiot because I didn't figure it out until two weeks later. So we get back home on Wed. and on Thursday evening I'm laying on the couch under a blanket freezing. Adam and Emma are walking around and seem to be very comfortable. And ding, the light bulb comes on. Do you put thoughts in quotation marks? Well, for the sake of this post, I'm going to. So the thinking process goes like this.. "I'm cold. When you ovulate, you have a slight fever. If you get pregnant you're temperature continues to rise for a while. Could I be pregnant? No way". Ok, without getting too personal since this is out there for the whole world to see... Not that I think anyone will take the time to read this book I'm writing here. But hey, this needs to be on record right? So anyway, all my female stuff was all messed up the month of Dec. things weren't happening on schedule so I just didn't think it could happen. So anyway, I got up and went to the bathroom and took a pregnancy test and low and behold... POSITIVE. So in my moment of sheer geniusness.. I called Emma to the bathroom to tell her. No, I didn't consider the fact that I hadn't seen a Dr. and the kind of detrimental effects it could have on her had I told her and then found out that something was wrong. So anyway, the conversation with Emma goes like this:

Me: Emma do you still want us to have a baby?
Emma: I want two
Me: Well, hopefully there's just one but I just took this test and it means that there is a baby in my belly.
Emma: (gasping and shock) Really? There's a baby in your belly?
Me: Yes, can you go tell Daddy that you're going to be a big sister?

And she did. And of course, Adam didn't understand what she was saying at first but we kind of got it all straightened out, looked at each other in shock for a little bit and then called our parents and sisters. Emma told them and it was really cute. I let Emma call her teacher and tell her but other than her and a couple of very close friends, we didn't tell anyone here because Adam wanted to tell the teenagers first. So, our plan was to tell the teenagers on Sunday. But then, I started having some pain in my left side. And, in true hormonal pregnant girl fashion, I got freaked out and worried that I had a tubal preganancy or something. So, we decided to wait until I saw a doctor before we told everyone at church. The big problem here was that we had already told Emma. So I asked her if she could keep it a secret until I went to the doctor and she did. I can't believe it but she kept a secret for a whole week. I'm very blessed that my dr. goes to church with us and I told her what was going on and she got me in Tuesday morning for an ultrasound. This is what we found out.. There was in fact a yoke sack where it was supposed to be so, no tubal pregancy. However, there is a cyst on my left ovary. Not an ideal situation. It's a little painful and uncomfortable but nothing that would hurt the baby. So we went on with our plans to tell the teenagers on Wed. So Adam tells them and much to my surprise tells the whole church during primetime. So of course everyone turned to look at me and I got good and embarassed and all of that fun stuff. But, everyone is very excited for us and very supportive so that is really nice. As soon as we gave Emma the ok, she started running around and telling one that "she was having a baby". If you ask her, it's her baby. I'm so proud of her.

So yep, that's the story. I'm pregnant. Eight weeks today to be exact. I'm so much more sick than I was with Emma. I've lost three pounds. A day that I only throw up twice is a good day. Even so, I can tell that my stomach is already growing. I'm not looking forward to that part. But I can't wait for the end result..

On a very serious note.. We have several friends that have been trying to conceive that we've been praying for for a long time. I can't help but to think of them now. I hate to know that our joy is going to be their pain. We have Emma praying for them every night now. Apparently her prayers go higher :). Please pray for them too. And please pray for me to have wisdom with dealing with that particular situation.

Love from Above,