Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Becoming Such a Little Lady

I heard somewhere that little girls get their first surge of hormones at age 4. Crazy I know but I think I can vouch for it. I started babysitting when I was eleven. I worked at an after school childcare program when I was in high school and as a lifeguard at a daycare when I was in college. I've always loved children. I think they help me keep a fresh perspective on life. But, ages 4 and 5 and then around 5th or 6th grade have always been the hardest ages for me. Probably those hormone surges. This has not been an exception with my own child. Go ahead, chastise me for not saying , "oh, every stage is my favorite" like every good mother is supposed to say. Go ahead and chastise me and we'll keep it between me and you that you're not being honest when you say that every stage is wonderful to you. If you don't have children yet or if you are still in the baby or toddler ages, I know what you're thinking. I thought it too. There once was a day when I thought I could never get frustrated with my child. But, bookmark this post. In a year or two, you might need to read it so that you won't feel alone in your frustration.

Don't get me wrong, we've still had sweet moments that I cherish and even the not so sweet moments mark a place on the path of the beautiful woman that will one day emerge from within her. It didn't help that we had some big life changes in the middle of this age (new baby sister and change in address). I think a daughter asserting her independence is always a hard thing for a mother. I'm sure we'll have these times in the future. But, for now, it seems as if we have made it over some metaphorical hump. And somehow we have ended this stage with her still calling me her best friend. If we can only make it through those teenage hormones with such success, maybe one day she will be a mother herself and she will still call me her best friend as I do my mother. I'm sure it didn't happen over night but somewhere during this first year of Kindergarten, the remainder of the baby that was still hanging on has been washed away. Sometimes when she's sleeping, I look at her in her bed and I think there is a beautiful 18 year old laying there. It won't be too long until there is. It's bittersweet. It's such a joy to watch her grow but sometimes I try to think of her at Chloe's age and it's already hard for me to remember.

Emma Ellis, one day, you'll have a child of your own and only then will you be able to comprehend how much love my heart holds for you.

Quotable: Emma has a small birthmark on her side. The other day, she walked down the hallway toward me and looking down and her birthmark she said, "hey, my birthmark is the shape of the state of Florida".



hyperactive lu said...

What happens to little boys between the ages of 3 and ........ whenever?! Ha! Gosh! You're so true... I hate this stage! There are lots of good days, but man! 3 and 4 have been a doosey!

Great post!

Dana said...

Ha! Maybe it's just the age. That wasn't very fair for those of you with boys. Hormones is such an easy excuse for myself, I thought I'd throw my daughter that bone :). Every child both boys and girls has his/her seasons!

Jay said...

Oh Dana, I am feeling you on this one lately. You know me --- I'm probably the most hard-headed person in the world, so she come by it honestly, but good grief. 5 year old girls are way more strong willed than my three year old girl ever was. --- and I thought she was assertive then. Mercy, I am sure that we have a long road ahead. I am so thankful that at the end of the day she still says that "she wouldn't want any other Mommy"

---I'm right there with ya!

Holly said...

I think it has a lot to do with the transition between being a little girl, and trying to be big. They are caught by wanting badly to do things that are big, but just aren't quite there yet,so it creates a lot of frustration... for us all! Lucy is the same way. I know exactly how you feel!

Sunny said...

I LOVE that picture! She is so beautiful! I can so relate to this post. My Abby Kate is such a joy, but there are times where I just don't get it. Yesterday was one of those days. I can't even count the number of times that she cried, just to be crying. :) They are so delicate and yet they want to be so strong. Enjoyed reading this.

Anonymous said...

I see these changes every year. I look back at the beginning of school pictures and wonder where those little ones have gone. I, as a kindergarten teacher, feel very blessed to be able to have a hand in the development of these little people. And, oh can the hormones rage in the little girls! Absolutely! Denise

Stephanie said...

Don't make me cry. I was looking at pictures and video of the week we brought Addison home and I can't remember how it felt to hold such a tiny baby or the sound of that newborn cry.

The Tyree Family said...

You can't do this to me! I made an audible "gasp" when I read you wrote all the baby is gone! I'm not ready for that. If your baby is all gone what's that mean for my baby? She's 5 months older than Emma. It just can't be.
Sorry for the drama. It's just how I feel today. I'm dramatic :)

Supabloggasuprememama said...

oh goody. i have so much to look forward to. and aiden is already such a constant joy. ;) love the birth mark comment!