Friday, May 22, 2009

Happy Mother's Day-- A tribute to my mother...

Yeah, I know it's two weeks late. But our job is hard! I think we should be celebrated every day. Besides, better late than pregnant right? Okay, since like 80 percent of my friends are pregnant right now, for most anyone that would read this, that isn't true but for me.. oh yes, better late than pregnant.

I really have trouble writing for a specific date.. It kind of reminds me of my honeymoon. It's like you have an appointment to well... you know... It just takes all the spontaneity away.. Nothing like putting the pressure on like having an appointment to have sex. Yes, I did just say that on my blog. Seriously, like you didn't know what people do on their honeymoons?

But, I did think about what I wanted to write on my blog about Mother's Day on Mother's Day and I'm actually proud of myself for writing it because well, I still haven't written a New Years post.. Anyway, this is how my Mother's Day went..

I woke up with a presentation from Emma and Chloe of a homemade coupon book. Since my love language is not gift giving and is totally, acts of service and because I like to pinch a penny until it screams, this was right up my alley. On the front of the book, it said. "Re-usable and never expires". And inside were the coupons: free hugs and kisses, clean the playroom without complaining, clean my bedroom without complaining, and free foot rub. With no expiration! Man, this is going to bite them in the tail. Don't think I won't be pulling those things out when they are teenagers. And when Emma is thirteen and she gets out of the car at school hoping that her friends don't notice that her mom dropped her off in her pajamas oh yes, then I will be whipping out my free hugs and kisses coupon. And I hate to see what Chloe is going to do to Emma when she figures out the mess her big sister has gotten her into. Wow, the feeling of power is addictive! Then, Adam also gave me some coupons for various helpful things. Now I realize that this would totally tick some women off but I really get irritated when someone spends the money I have carefully budgeted on something that I didn't budget for. Even if it is for me. Adam also made me breakfast and it was just a sweet moment between us all.

Now Adam has to be at church an hour and a half earlier than me because they are having a book discussion before church. Since we don't have classes in the morning, I don't go since there would be no book discussing if my kids were there. So, the moment didn't last incredibly long and soon, the chaos began. On most Sundays the girls play nicely until Adam leaves and the second he does, they are right under me the whole time I'm trying to get ready. I just love the fact that I can find a pair of flip flops with a little bit of a heal on them and some beads on the straps and call them dress shoes. So, I put on my "dressy" flip flops and noticed that my toe nail polish was chipped on the ends. In my normal Sunday single mother rush, I ran into the bathroom and grabbed the nail polish and touched up the ends of my toes. Declaring it a decent job unless someone looks closely, I moved on to the mirror for makeup. About that time, Chloe, stepped on my toe.. My freshly painted toenail!

I started to get irritated, but repressed the irritation, in honor of the day, feeling the need to be a sweet, patient, mother, therefore earning my Mother's Day coupons. And, I began to think about a particular Mother's Day with my mother.... I was about seven years old. I had only a few dollars that I am assuming that I got from her in the first place. So I went to Family Dollar with my dad and I bought my mom the most beautiful I had ever seen- three dollar-pept0 bismal pink- plastic set of beads. Both necklace and bracelet. Nice job of guiding that one dad..

Now I'm pretty crafty at handling this type of situations with my children. My solution would be something of this sort: Oh wow, these are the most beautiful beads that I have ever seen. I don't have a dress to match this color of pink but I have the perfect pajamas! So tomorrow night, we are going to have a candlelit mother daughter pajama dinner! And I am going to make all of our favorite foods and then we are going to talk about all things that we love about each other and I am going to wear these beautiful beads. Now I have no doubt that this would work with Emma and she would think I was the coolest mother in the world for it.

But heres the thing... Twenty four years later (yes I did count on my fingers), I remember the dress that my mother pulled out of the closet saying that it would go perfectly with those beads. That dress was not pink it was more of a rose color and it did not match those horrible beads.. And I remember how she ooohd and ahhd as she had me clasp that necklace around her neck. And when we got to church and I realized that all the other mothers had corsages and I hadn't gotten my mother one. My mother told me not to brag because the other mothers only got a flower and not beautiful beads that they could wear over and over again. And I sat there next to my mother not yet fully understanding why she was truly the best mother in world but feeling confident that I was definitely the best daughter in the world. And you know what? When I called her this year on Sunday morning to wish her a Happy Mother's Day, and mentioned the beads, she told me that she still had them and she still thought they were beautiful. And really, that's probably been the most influential thing in my life. No matter how bad I fumble, my mom is always there, cheering me on, thinking I'm great. And I know that I will always have that security.

So there were all of those thoughts over a simple smudge in toenail polish. And inspired by my mother, I reached down and fluffed Chloe's hair and took a step in the direction of being the kind of mother mine was and wore my smudge to church. And it was a wonderful day!

7 comments:

Lu said...

Ok, first of all, DARN! you're STILL not pregnant!!!! ;) Waiting on that surprise!

Second, I'm up super late, because I can't sleep and I didn't really want to cry, but shoot girl! Precious post.... what a wonderful honor we have to be mothers! You're mother sounds awesome! Don't know if I could do what she did- especially if they are tacky!!!

Holly said...

How sweet. You got the water-works flowing for me this morning!

Anonymous said...

Dana this is so good!! You always write the most touching blogs. It is always uplifting and usually brings tears to my eyes. We are looking forward to seeing you all in June. Hopefully we can get together at least once while you are here. Have a great day! Love Yall, Gena

Tony and Susan said...

that was such a sweet story! i hope i can come up with words as sweet as your mother and as you (candlelight pj party!).

i notice that you have officially been indoctrinated to the SC way...you have the palmetto tree and crescent moon! do you have one on your car, too??

Dana said...

I actually have the palm tree and crescent moon to go on my car but haven't applied it yet as my car is need of a heavy duty wash and it's been raining for last few days. But yes, I've been indoctrinated. Glady.. But hey, my car is a minivan so I already sold out to dorkiness a couple of years ago ;).

Supabloggasuprememama said...

LOVE this. especially the part about the Honeymoon. I LOVE how we're told how scathingly horrid it is our entire lives and then suddenly we're free to DO IT after putting some rings on our fingers. No wonder I STILL have a complex. haha. Okay I rambled. This entry is really sweet!!!

Tina said...

Better late than pregnant!! I totally was touched by your writing on Mothers. You have a gift girl, and God-gift. I have to get back to my blog. It's been several months. Keep it up, I enjoy your blog very much.